Can I have a shot gIass, pIease?
Photo sent.
Stay on this heading for about 6h30min.
Turn left at the Aurora Borealis.
When you see something that looks like a frozen gall bladder, that's Greenland.
Hang a soft right there.
-All set there, Mr. Hauser? -Yeah, thank you.
Guidestar!
Welcome back.
Hotel? Dinner reservations? Movie tickets, maybe?
Mr. Hauser ls there something else you need?
I don't know. I feeI...
Go on.
Like a refuge from the IsIand of Dr. Moreau.
Some moraIIy inverted, twisted character from a CeIine noveI.
The hot sauce heIps.
You still getting those nightmares you told me about?
They're coming back faster and faster. I don't know if I can keep outrunning 'em.
That'II be it, Jerry. I gotta go.
You bet, Mr. Hauser. GuideStar wants you to feel secure.
GuideStar.
Be stiII my trembIing hands, for how you wouId trembIe...
if you knew where I wouId take you next.
lncoming message.
You got him on the comm there? Bring it over.
Hello, Hauser!
HeIIo, Mr. Vice President.
I haven't been vice president for five months.
Otherwise, this aII might be a confIict of interest.
TamerIane and the U.S. government, and I in particuIar, were cIeared...
of any and all violations of federal, state and international laws...
by the bipartisan committee.
Just read the report.
I'm sure anything you weren't supposed to be doing you were cIeared of.
And of course I was preemptiveIy pardoned by the president.
I got the snapshots. Love your work.
-We're aII big fans. -Yes.
Let's see if the damn Krauts...
wiII cross us in the Security CounciI now.
We seem to be heading southeast. Where am I going?
Hope you Iike the smeII of fresh Iiberation.
Give me a sec.
I gotta growIer down there the size of a cane frog.
Turaqistan.
What's the gig?
Omar Sharif.
-Omar Sharif? -Yeah.
The CEO of Ugi Gas, the Ugikistani conglomerate.
He is building a pipeline through his country.
We didn't liberate Turaqistan to get hustled by a fez head.
Terminate.
Do do that voodoo that you do so well.
You'II be working directIy under the viceroy just appointed by the president.
His identity is stiII being withheId on a need to know basis.
-And no one needs to know. -He asked for you personaIIy.
-What's my cover? -Trade show producer.
Trade show? What show? What show?
It's gonna be huge.
TamerIane is sponsoring a trade expo, Brand USA.
It's our big Iaunch bringing democracy to this part of the worId.
We've bombed the shit out of them, there's a Iot of rebuiIding to do.
-Shows a nice spirit. -Somebody has to heIp them.
This is a great opportunity for Tamerlane and the U.S.
Not to mention the people of Turaqistan.
And to top it aII off, there's gonna be a gaIa wedding. Isn't that great?
Seems Iike a pretty eIaborate cover. I'm gonna be responsibIe for aII that shit?
This is a historic moment.
The first war ever to be 100% outsourced to private enterprise.
TamerIane jets, TamerIane tanks, TamerIane soIdiers.
And to top it aII off, the Brand USA expo.
It's your show, baby.
WeIcome to the Turaqi Green Zone, sir.
Tamerlane welcomes Expo Turaqistan, Brand USA.
WeIcome to Turaqistan, sir. I'm Marsha DiIIon...
hoping you're ready to kiII.
I've been briefed.
SPF-Eighty-seven, sir.
-ShaII we? -Yes.
It aII Iooks good.
Great Iights.
Take out the Tamercard.
What's your cover, by the way?
Undergrad Wharton with a masters in communication at the Annenberg SchooI.
-Very impressive. -WeII, it's fake.
-TeII me that's not the stage? -I think it is.
East, honey, east.
Do you want peopIe turning away from the stage to pray five times a day?
CuIturaI sensitivity. That's what we're about here.
Sorry, sir.
What exactIy is wrong with my credentiaIs?
I've been cIeared. My coIIeagues are going in.
-Am I being singIed out for some reason? -I can't aIIow that.
Very curious.
-Find out who she is. -Very curious situation.
-Let's go, ma'am. -Oh. Okay.
And set up a meeting with her in my office.
Do I have an office?
Great. Carry on.
Yes, and I'II just try to rearrange the entire pIace.
-Just see if you can spin it. -Yes.
Ms. HegaIhuzen.
Your 2:30's here.
I read your piece in ''AtIantic MonthIy''.
Very provocative.
-Nice office. -It's buIIetproof.
Send her in.
Passion. This is beautifuI.
Thank you!
Hey, okay, okay, we'II be in touch.
-It's a gift. I brought a gift to you. -Thank you.
-It's a form of dance. -Thank you. Good stuff.
Pay-for-view TV. Next week!
And you are an angeI.
Thanks for the bag!
Ms. ''HugeIhazen''.
HegaIhuzen.
-HegaIhuzen. Brand Hauser. -HeIIo.
-Hi. -Hey.
Come on in.
Now...
HoIy shit!
So, you're here to cover our IittIe trade show...
''...that's being biIIed as a Iiberating Turaqistan...
satisfy the American consumer's dreams just the opposite now.
The proposed Expo Turaqistan offers nothing more than the auctioning of...
Turaqistan's future to the cause of profit and internationaI branding.
Yeah, I remember that because I wrote it.
There's no corruption here. Just read the SiIverman James Report.
I have. It's buIIshit.
Look. We've aIready kicked out of this pIace. What are we supposed to do?
Turn our backs on aII of the entrepreneuriaI possibiIities?
Business is human response to a moraI or cosmic crisis.
Whether it's a tsunami or a sustained aeriaI bombardment...
there's the same urgent caII for urban renewaI.
When did they start attacking inside the EmeraId City?
I wouIdn't caII that an attack.
WeII, technicaIIy, that was a bombing. At Ieast it sounded Iike it was.
Not an attack, which wouId impIy something eIse.
Do you reaIIy think I'm as bad as aII this?
-I don't know anything about you. -WouId you Iike to?
It's my job.
You make it sound so tedious. CouId be fun.
-Then why don't I begin? -Thought you'd never ask.
WouId you excuse me for one minute?
-CaII me soon. -When?
You'II feeI it.
-AII righty then. Where were we? -I haven't said anything yet.
ExceIIent, 'cause I don't remember hearing anything.
-Then we're off to a great start. -What can I do for you?
Why do I have access? Even on such a Iow IeveI.
Ouch.
AII my writings have caIIed this a vioIation of internationaI Iaw...
and its practitioners are criminaIs.
Do you reaIIy beIieve aII the stuff you write?
Anyone who couId cause this much mayhem when he didn't have to?
The amount of suffering that I've seen?
Hang on.
Okay. HoId on a sec.
But the way I Iook at it is this.
The day we can actuaIIy feeI and hear aII the suffering of mankind...
that's the day when the Christ wiII come back.
So we got that going for us. I'II be out in a minute.
Or the Buddha, or AIIah, whoever fIoats your boat.
Ms. HagenhazeI.
-CaII me NataIie. -NataIie.
I reaIIy must run. I feeI Iike we're on the verge of something important.
Do you think we couId continue this conversation over drinks?
-Drinks? -Yeah, I know a friendIy pIace.
Marsha, wiII you set that up? 9, 10-ish?
Unattended cars will be crushed and incinerated.
HeIIo, sir. WeIcome to Popeye's. How can I heIp you?
I'II have crawfish etouffee, the Big FIava chicken sandwich with Boss Sauce...
and to top off my meaI, a frothy orange drink.
-I'm here to see the viceroy. -Sir.
Don't mention his name. FoIIow me!
Okay!
Let's go, boys. One, two, one, two march!
-He's not here? -CIosed circuit, sir.
Welcome to liberated Turaqistan, Hauser.
Big fan. Have been for ages.
Sorry for the secret identity bullshit...
but it's a brave new security.
l'll be contacting you by phone, but if you wish to contact me...
you'll have to come here to the bunker, 'kay?
Omar Sharif. He's staying at the Freedom Grand through the closing ceremony.
Make sure he doesn't make his plane.
Got it.
Now, about this closing ceremony...
lt looks like we Yonica Babyyeah wedding. lncredible, huh?
What is a Yonica Babyyeah?
The Britney Spears of Central Asia.
Kids from Baca to Yemen are nuts for her.
Anyway. The point is...
this weddin' is the grand finale of the trade show.
This is the biggest extravaganza in the history of Central Asia.
And it's the centerpiece of our P.R. blitz here.
lt's perfect branding synergy, Hauser.
BIends the image of an American-styIe woman getting her own and getting it on.
A great new democratic dynasty...
with aII the strength and viriIity of traditionaI warIords.
Exactly. That's why you're the best.
Overall, we see it as a pretty irresistible package.
We're getting worldwide coverage, U.S. networks, Sky Channel, Al Jazeera...
so make it big buddy.
See she gets everything she wants and make this a grand finale...
the world will never forget.
You bet.
Jeff? So, Iisten. I met this guy... No, he's just some mid-IeveI schmo.
Anyway, I think if I pIay him right, I can get a pass out of the Green Zone...
and I can see what's reaIIy going on here.
No chip for me, thanks.
Ma'am, you reaIIy won't get the fuII experience without the chip.
Doctor's orders. I get hives.
Welcome to lmplanted Journalist Experience.
Thanks to cutting-edge Tamerlane lnteractive Technology...
we are now able to reduce the risk of journalist mortality to virtually zero.
The Combat-o-Rama lmplantation Device...
will allow you to experience full spectrum sensory reality.
Over the next seventy-two hours, some of you may experience...
headaches, nausea and some muscle pain. This is normal.
lf symptoms of epilepsy occur, please notify your doctor.
Thanks and enjoy the ride.
Mr. Hauser!
Yonica Baby is two minutes from arrivaI. We need to go.
Yonica! I Iove you!
Jesus Christ.
Hi. WeIcome. How was traffic?
I hear those checkpoints can be murder.
Where is dressing room? I'm fucking wasted.
WeII, Iet me show you.
She needs Popeye ten-piece box. AII white meat.
Extra crispy, extra spicy. Diet Coke. You get it?
And pickIes.
She wants pickIes. CIausen cIassic diII pickIes.
-PickIes? -Yeah.
-AII right... -You are big boss?
-I guess I am, yeah. -How big?
Don't do that.
Confiscate that fiIm.
I do what I want. Okay?
Of course you do and we're excited to have you.
Don't get too excited.
I'm not that excited. Let me show you to your dressing room.
Get some chicken, pickIes. and whatever you want.
Come on in. Hi. Nice work with the bat.
How are you? Hi, good Iuck.
Hi. Mr. PickIe. Las Vegas. Mr. FederIine.
The impending marriage of Central Asian pop star...
and Ooq- Mi-Fay Taqnufmini the scion of the powerful Turaqi clan.
The marriage. A symbol of democratization...
or a sleazy public relations stunt?
Yes or no?
NataIie.
-Hi. -Hi.
Jesus. What is this pIace?
It's the Freedom Grand. How do you Iike it?
Guess I couId go with strange Iove in the desert.
Weird. Rarefied. Coven-Iike.
-Stop me if I'm rambIing. -Stop. Sit.
Can I get a doubIe bourbon? Vodka twist? How's that?
-Okay. -Thank you.
So, you're producing the big...
Freedom's on the March economic Iand-grab masquerade.
Are you with TamerIane empIoyee or a freeIance producer?
That's compIicated. Let's get to that Iater.
I just wanted to get to know you.
Okay, teII me about yourseIf.
Just doing this gig, trying to make the best of a bad situation.
Looking for redemption in aII the wrong pIaces. Stop me now if I'm rambIing.
-Okay, stop. -How about you?
How about me what?
You know, teII me about you. Where're you from?
Who gives a fuck? Are you serious?
I'm serious as a deacon. I'd Iike to get to know you as a person.
For God's sakes... why?
WeII, what the heII eIse are we gonna do on this dark and IoneIy night?
So you wanna seduce the journaIist whose poIitics you despise?
How dare you? I have no poIitics.
Everyone does, even if they don't know it.
-Not me. -Just a straight mercenary?
I'm a host. I'm a showman. I'm an organizer.
There's just peopIe here. Some good, some bad. AII interesting.
You seem Iike an interesting person and I try not to over-think these things.
You're a cIever guy. Some wouId even caII you charming.
But it gets tired, doesn't it? AII that patter, the show biz, it's just a mask.
There's gotta be a person in there somewhere.
Did you know that ''person'' comes from the Latin word persona which means mask?
Being human means we invite spectators...
to ponder what Iies behind.
Each of us wouId be composed of a variety of masks.
And if we can see behind the mask, we wouId get a burst of cIarity.
If that fIame was bright enough, then we faII in Iove.
What's your opinion on these divine matters?
I'm not gonna fuck you. You know that, right?
Oh, I hope that you know that somewhere.
I sense you're such an angry woman.
You're just intent to Iaying waste to aII of us, aren't you?
That was the best haIf-true frontier gibberish I've heard.
Thanks.
-Hey. Listen. -Yes?
AII access pass to the trade show, compIiments of the house.
-Don't be a stranger. -I won't be.
Now, Iet's get these passe's right.
Ayat, a IittIe knee jerk.
Make it work. Make it work.
Very good.
AII in the Iegs, girIs.
How many times do we have to say this? Ayat!
Higher!
Big smiIe, Reshbeck! For God's sake.
Thank you.
You're back for some more gibberish.
You remember Marsha? This is Peter Parker.
Choreographer, worked with Rob MarshaII, aII the big musicaIs.
It's incredibIe. Each girI is a trans-femoraI amputee...
who had Iost her Ieg during the Iiberation.
And thanks to TamerIane, we can have you up and dancing in no time.
Just another exampIe of how American know-how...
aIIeviates the suffering it creates.
Look at this. Hamy Shenkman had her Ieg bIown off by an M-18 CIaymore Iandmine.
And, ConyeI BisIand... an M-72 rocket-propeIIed grenade...
that mistakenIy hit her high schooI.
And TamerIane used the exact same RPG firing pin rod assembIy technoIogy...
that it uses in the prosthetic knees of its.
TaIk about verticaI integration.
It's hot in here. Let me get that for ya.
Krishmish, come over here.
This is Ms. HegaIhuzen, she's writing a story about the show.
AII right. Okay.
Ms. Babyyeah's ready for her run-through.
We've gotta go. My trade show's your trade show.
Come on, girIs. Gather here.
You say you want to invade me, baby
You say you want to enslave me, baby
l want to blow you up
You say you want to free me, baby
BGut you cannot even see me, baby
l want to blow you up
l want to blow you sky high, high, go fly
l want to blow
You
You want to occupy my heart and soul
A black widow in a spider hole
l want to blow you up
l want to blow you down if it's okay
Mr. Hauser, how do you feeI about the image of Turaqi women...
My coat!
Cut!
So there's this reporter who reaIIy despises me.
I mean, she doesn't reaIIy despise me, she despises what I represent.
I think if she knew the reaI me, she'd hate me even more.
I mean, don't you think?
l wasn't there. Does it really matter?
ActuaIIy, I think I just Iike the sound of her voice.
I couId Iisten to her reviIe me for hours.
Do you think with her, the reporter I mean, it's just about sex?
-What do you mean just? -I don't know.
There's this Turaqi pop star. She disturbs me and I can't figure out why.
Could you be attracted to her sexually?
No, are you crazy? She's just a IittIe...
l'm not calling you in the middle of the night, Mr. Hauser.
-I gotta go. -Whatever.
You're a fuckin' asshoIe.
GuideStar!
This has to end for me, sir. I want a different kind of Iife.
I want to get married, start a famiIy.
Operation Chickenhawk never ends.
The ceaseIess epic struggIe to dominate...
the destiny of man obIiges his nobIe cares to continuaIIy purge the worId...
of those who are eviI-doers.
But that's not just working for me right now, sir.
A woman?
You and I, Hauser, are a part of a rug hook.
AII these years I feIt a speciaI bond. Don't you feeI that?
No.
WeII, you think about it.
If you stiII feeI this way in a coupIe of days...
I aIready toId you, sir.
-That'II be aII. -Yes, sir.
Marsha, this is kind of a bad time.
Hey! l wanted to give you the heads up. A delivery should be there any second.
When, now?
Oh, shit.
Sir, I have your dry cIeaning, sir!
Thank you. Thank you.
I need the ticket, sir.
-I have that somewhere. -Yeah, I need that cIaim ticket, sir.
I think I put it... shouId be around here somewhere.
-You're taIking about the cIaim ticket? -It's around here somewhere.
-Sir, can you hurry? -Yep.
Sir, I gotta have that ticket or...
No, no...
Oh, here it is.
-Sir, you have a nice day. -Sure.
Yo, yo, yo, mother fuckers!
It's me.
-Hi. -Hi.
Straight from the dry in Rammstein, Germany
You can't beIieve these guys. 20 years ahead of the rest of the worId.
And this cost the U.S. taxpayers, what? Three, four grand?
Be nice. I'm reaIIy sorry about the jacket.
Okay.
Listen, wouId you Iike to get a Turaqi coffee?
I hear they make it great here. Cardamom mace. The good kind.
I was just about to wash my hair.
It's a deIicacy. Sweetened with pomegranate honey.
One cup?
Give me a minute.
What?
There's just something irresistibIe about a Western woman speaking Turaqi.
Is that a recognized internationaI phenomena?
No. It's a personaI sensibiIity.
Look. I admit I don't actuaIIy beIieve any of this stuff we say.
I mean, not in the sense that I beIieve it to be actuaIIy true.
You taIk too much. I want to ask you something.
Doesn't it hurt you to put yourseIf in such a contorted moraI position?
Can you teII me, for exampIe, one compIeteIy honest thing?
One.
This is Donny Loo's favorite juice.
It is rated at just under a quarter miIIion ScoviIIe units.
When I find the demands of Iife to be chaIIenging...
I take a wee drop.
The more chaIIenging...
the higher the ScoviIIe units.
-Let me. -Be carefuI.
But the trick, you see...
that I've taught myseIf, is to never aIIow my eyes to tear up.
One compIeteIy honest thing.
If you reaIIy knew me, you'd despise me even more than you do.
No. I don't despise you.
I don't reaIIy care enough.
Marsha.
It's fucking great. MichaeI Bay can bIow me.
He can and he shouId.
-We do aII of Yonica's videos. -We're bIowing up.
A bad choice of words.
Listen, guys, this has been great. Thank you.
I have another meeting. I have to run. But I, I reaIIy enjoyed it.
Let us have some footage of the wedding. We'II hook you up, dude.
Hey, we know everything that goes on in Turaqistan.
No pIace we cannot go, no one we don't know, nothing we cannot do.
Okay.
Does one of you have a card? Whoever the Ieader is.
Here we go. The Jackpot.
Here, thank you. Thank you.
There you go. You have his, and he has yours.
-Yes. -He's got yours.
-It's gonna be great. -Bye-bye, guys.
Where's my package?
The shipment Ieft the warehouse in Dubai 2 days ago.
We're tracking it.
Just get me a fuckin' cobra, aII right?
-A snake? -Yeah. Chop-chop.
Come on, spit it out.
Is onIy me, Mr. Big
Yonica. Hi.
Listen. Sorry about my reaction to your song. I didn't mean to offend you.
No. I am sorry. I am so stupid to not understand that you are woman.
Uh, sorry?
In Turaqi we have no word for this. Same as for a woman.
No, no, no. That's not it.
I predict most peopIe. Why not you?
How my ass make you puke?
Bad babakanoosh or something.
I think you're IoveIy. Stunning, actuaIIy.
-LoveIy? -Yes.
You think attractive?
Yep. DefiniteIy.
-Does her ass make you puke? -Who? Who? Who?
That skinny bitch reporter with the tape recorder.
No.
You're a tit man. Do you want massage?
Be a happy ending.
Does your father know that you taIk this way?
-My father? -Yeah.
I do not speak to him anymore.
But he sends me money for dancing Iessons and singing Iessons.
I am with Ooq-Mi-Fay now.
And he wants for me to be big success.
Yonica ruIes. That is what he says to me.
-What about your mother? -Dead.
I'm sorry.
For why? You did not kiII her.
I don't think so.
Too much sorry. Too much.
Jesus Christ! What is wrong with you?
You are a fucking asshoIe, do you know that?
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
''I'm sorry''. You're aIways sorry.
Fuck you, Mr. Sorry. Fuck you.
Yonica, don't go away mad.
Marsha?
Get me a dinner reservation tonight. Somewhere with soup.
So everything's OK? You're cIosing some big deaIs at the trade show?
Is there an actuaI reason for this meeting?
I am not big on buIIshit.
I'm your host. I want you to be happy nd that everything is...
weII and you're taken care of.
A beautifuI woman.
There is something we can agree on after aII, then.
Can you get me an introduction?
-She's a journaIist. -Who cares?
Sit. Don't eat aII your soup.
Thank you.
So between your father's indictments, were you still on the lacrosse team?
No. I actuaIIy bIew out my fuckin' knee. Hey, you.
Hey, we are doing an interview here.
Omar Sharif wants to meet you.
-The actor? -Better. The president of Ugi Gas.
Sorry. Just one minute.
I'm gonna pick this up in one.
who do I have to shoot to get a fuckin' drink around here?
What are you Iooking at?
Get back to normaI!
NataIie HegaIhuzen, Omar Sharif.
ExquisiteIy enraptured, ma chere.
-PIeased to meet you, too. -ShaII we dance?
How're you doin'?
How come we Americans a hard time?
An interesting conundrum, isn't it?
Very shrewd of you to ask.
What wouId I get for teIIing you?
The thriII of knowing you're my confidentiaI source.
The thought of this Ieaves me breathIess.
My dear, Iet me expIain something to you.
The Americans had no pIan.
Perhaps next year they wiII invade my country.
And then, they wiII either kiII me or throw me in jaiI.
Or kiII me in jaiI.
Or maybe make me president.
Or maybe make me president, then kiII me.
That stiII doesn't answer you question.
Why hasn't the U.S. stopped the Ugi Gas pipeIine?
See what you can find out about Operation Chickenhawk.
Chickenhawk?
Yeah, baby!
Get it out.
A message from the viceroy.
Freedom is messy.
Employees must wash hands before returning to work.
What stinks here?
Yeah. You Iook Iike piece of shit. You smeII Iike piece of shit.
You want some shit?
Where're you going? Night's young.
This pIace is crazy.
WouId you Iike to come back to my suite for a quiet drink?
Oh, no thank you, Omar. But I wiII Iook into that thing about you toId.
Enjoyed it.
-I think I'II go back to my hoteI. -Can I drive you?
Oh, no, that's okay.
Let me give you a Iift. I can heIp you. It's safer that way.
PIease. I'II feeI better.
When did aII that construction start?
Oh. They're diverting the river Tures so it runs by the trade show.
They wanted a cIear view from the Tiki Room. It's cute, huh?
What do you think of that girI, Yonica?
You don't wanna know.
-Come on. Try me. -Okay.
I think that she's a sad IittIe girI who's been pimped out...
into a pathetic monstrosity of aIienated Western sexuaIity.
How do you feeI about that, Mr. Hauser?
She's a disaster. This whoIe pIace is a disaster.
So, you're sIeeping with her.
No.
Why not? She seems game.
It must be nice to be who you say you are. To do things you beIieve in.
That's so simpIe. So cIean.
It's Iike, you know: ''why didn't I think of that''?
WeII, it's hard not to feeI Iike...
I'm aIways on the Iosing side.
WeII, you are.
Yeah. It gets kinda IoneIy.
That's why you got aII those peasants and workers to keep you company.
I don't have that big a bed.
TeII me more.
I think that you shouId take me home now.
Yes, weII...
thanks for taking me home.
Oh. Good night then.
Jesus, what was that?
I can't do that...
No. You yourseIf said, I just don't want to.
-Yeah. Sure. -And good night.
Tomorrow can I see ya?
-Tomorrow? -Yeah.
Reporter's PooI, ten a.m.
Progress update, peopIe.
Banks West didn't even wait for the opening ceremony...
cIosing a one point 3 biIIion doIIar deaI...
with Roof Branch and BIossom to restore essentiaI water services...
to the peopIe of Turaqistan!
Oh, come on!
I'm sure they'd Iike to give a shout-out to the TamerIane- Furg-Bomber...
Wing for, for those humane position strikes...
that created this wonderfuI opportunity for everyone.
So is this Iike a date?
This is Iike obscene.
There's something you can do for me that wouId mean a Iot.
Name it.
Get me a pass out of the EmeraId City so I can see what's reaIIy going on.
-Very dangerous. -I wanna see FaIIof.
NataIie, there's nothing there.
I wanna know if it's true that TamerIane used chemicaI weapons.
Isn't it a IittIe Iate to be worrying about internationaI conventions?
Is nerve gas worse than getting your head bIown off by a Iaser missiIe?
FrankIy, it's a nuance that's Iost on me.
Besides they were cIeared, just read the report.
We're trying to watch a battIe here.
Sorry.
Come on, come on, come on. Give me something. Give me something.
Anything's gotta be better than this Xbox buIIshit!
Okay, okay.
These guys are big in the Turaqi arts community.
You know, the whoIe downtown scene?
Might give you a good Iead.
I'm hit! I'm hit!
Where's the damn Medevac?
The Tamerlane custom E-Z missile mount can...
be adapted to fit over 200 automobile models...
I thought we were aII set with the AyatoIIah.
Pick it up, boys.
What do you mean he won't do a mixed wedding? Who's mixed?
Yonica's EpiscopaIian? How the fuck did that happen?
WiII the Sufi work?
Let me caII you back. I got another caII.
Just get a number for Cat Stevens.
HeIIo. Can you caIm down? Yeah, he's right here.
Yoni... That was the girI.
She said she can't do the wedding if you're invoIved.
She thinks you don't Iike her.
-What? -She can't work with you.
I'm on it, I'm on it. Okay.
And then Anderson Cooper, Mr. SaIt and Pepper Integrity...
is arriving today and, and aII we have Ieft is a junior suite.
Is that okay? I mean, he is a VanderbiIt and everything.
There couId be repercussions!
GuideStar!
You seem a little bit, Mr. Hauser. ls everything all right?
My hand was shaking. My hand never shakes.
Worst case, Parkinson's. l can get you a doctor's appointment in Dubai.
I can't focus.
This girI. This reporter. They're in my head.
They're in my fucking brain.
That's not good, Mr. Hauser. Not good.
No, I know it isn't. And now I gotta see her, the IittIe one.
I gotta bring her food. 'Cause she won't go to the thing.
Fuck!
Trusting you was a little rude
l wish there was a way
You could sooth that ache in me
Phone cut out When we were talking today
That was beautifuI.
-You recorded that yet? -Fat fucking chance.
WeII you shouId.
I feeI Iike it's Iike I'm seeing you for the first time.
WeII, you've seen my ass. And you not Iiking it.
-Why do you do that? -Do what?
TaIk as if you have no souI.
Nobody cares for my beautifuI souI. They care for my ass.
-You sound Iike a tramp. -Bitches ruIe.
Yonica ruIes.
Virgins are good for getting fucked. Right?
That is what I am good for. Right?
That's what everybody knows.
You know what I think?
I think the girI that wrote that song was a poet.
I thought that song was reaIIy great.
I am not from this worId.
I have speciaI powers.
I can see inside peopIe's brains.
What do you see?
You think you care about me.
Neither one of us know why.
You're not an aIien Iife form.
You're just very confused.
And you Iive in a terribIe worId.
I cannot be from this pIace. I do not beIong here.
We have to find a way.
We just have to find a way.
Who are you?
We got stuff here.
We got a side of CIausen CIassic DiII,
and Turaqi brand soda.
Extra crispy, aII white meat. You want a piece?
It's actuaIIy a horribIe way to soothe bad feeIings...
but can Iead to compuIsive eating...
But, you know, sometimes you just gotta do it, right?
What the fuck?
You know what?
I'm gonna bIow you up. you mother fuckin' nice...
suit necktie piece of shit!
Take a rain check on that.
Out of the EmeraId City?
In fact, baby, the money is right, I can take you to Chechnya.
I couId scrape together a thousand doIIars.
Honey, for a thousand doIIar we take you to Starbucks.
So, we open on her, she's Iike Snow White.
Then he arrives. A two-shot, Iike in, Ford's My DarIing CIementine.
When Victor Mature returns to her.
Fuck fiIm, asshoIes.
I want her on aII fours.
Waiting for her phaIIic warIord, Ooq-Mi-Fay.
I know it's none of my business, what are you guys taIking about?
We're shooting the wedding night's video.
Yeah, check it out. We aIready made the card.
My God.
-How much you guys want for this? -500 bucks.
I'II give you 50 right now, cash.
Done.
Washington's all a-twitter by allegations from a journalist...
that the son of a top Turaqi political leader...
and his pop star bride are involved...
in a pornographic video of their own wedding night.
Expo Turaqistan. Out of the frying pan into the fire?
How in the fuck did this Hegalhuzen bitch get a hold of this story?
WeII, it hardIy matters now.
The network might cancel their coverage and we own them.
We got riots going on in 1 4 cities across Central Asia.
Maybe the best thing to do wouId be to caII the wedding off.
Have you lost your mind? Just handle it.
I aIways do.
Do you think I have no feeIings?
This is what I am to you?
-A whore? And you are my pimp? -No, baby, no, baby.
You were going to seII a tape of our wedding night?
I was gonna give you haIf of the money.
I did it for the money.
There wiII be ampIe time for Ioving recriminations.
But Iet's deaI with this from a practicaI perspective.
What if we pubIicaIIy remove one of his testicIes?
-Dad, pIease! -Shut up.
That's not an entireIy unappeaIing suggestion...
but I'm not sure if that reaIIy gets us where we wanna go.
HonestIy, your ExceIIency, if we're gonna puII this off so a man of your stature...
you know, a four-time convicted extortionist and an embezzIer Iike...
yourseIf is to Iead Turaqistan to its bright and shining future...
Yonica's bridegroom must be bIameIessIy pristine.
In other words, we need a faII guy.
How about your homeboy outside with the perforated septum?
P-per... what?
Go, Marsha. Go, Marsha. You're so fine. I'm gonna make her change her mind!
I have a can of Mace!
And I wiII use it! Sit down!
I think Bodhi organized this whoIe thing and you didn't know anything about it.
Yeah, of course, man. I didn't know shit.
But, you know, we wanna be cuIturaIIy sensitive here.
What is the traditionaI punishment for pimping a pop star?
-Wow, that's fucking coId, Pop. -Shut up.
Drowning in sheep dung.
Marsha wiII make the arrangements.
AII right. We've deaIt with the groom. Now for the bride.
20 minutes on TV and the worId wiII know that this sweet, young girI...
wouId never participate in such a fouI, fouI enterprise. Right?
And, Yonica, you didn't know anything about this.
So it has the added benefit of being true, as my father used to say.
AII right. We'II announce the execution tonight.
We'II do the interview tomorrow...
and we go ahead with the wedding and cIose the whoIe damn show.
I think we got this worked out, don't you?
-Great. -AII right. Good to see you.
No, no, no...
Thank you so much, sir.
Yonica... Honey! Honey!
Yonica, Yonica!
Thank you. I Iike bag.
Marsha. Get me Katie Couric, AI Jazeera and a hundred gaIIons of sheep shit.
Slaves, but...
Slaves, plebians, patricians, ladies and gentlemen.
Welcome to Pax Romana...
Virginia's number one Roman-era theme park.
The gIory that was Rome. The grandeur that was Six FIags.
UnfortunateIy the financing feII through in the reaI estate crash...
and the whoIe pIace went down the toiIet. But it makes my point.
Which is...?
Every empire is summed up in Rome. The Romans, Hauser.
Dudes of the human race. Torch-bearers of cuIture.
You and I are Centurions.
Honor bound to defend civiIization against the Barbarians.
Let's cut the shit, WaIken.
I Iike kiIIing peopIe as much as the next guy...
but I signed up to kiII the bad ones. HeaIth cIinics, trade unionists...
journaIists, agricuIturaI co-ops, CathoIic Iiberation theoIogians...
impoverished CoIombian coffee farmers...
These are barbarians, the depraved opponents of civiIization?
We turned CentraI America into a fucking graveyard.
Whoever momentariIy interrupts the accumuIation of our weaIth...
we puIverize.
I'm just not feeIing good about that anymore, sir.
Then do what you have to do, son.
Thank you for understanding, sir.
-Oh! You asshoIe. -Weapon, pIease?
Let's waIk and taIk.
You didn't reaIIy think I'd Iet you go, did you?
-I was kinda hoping you might, yeah. -For her?
PIease, WaIken. We had such a good working reIationship.
Let's not end it Iike this, Iike savages in a theme park.
You get the thumbs down from the crowd, Hauser.
You're obsoIete, dude.
Past your expiration date, discontinued.
Garbagio, as they say in Latin.
ReIegated to the trash bin of history.
You shouIdn't rummage in the garbage. Fuck.
Is this one of those pIastic toys you can choke on?
You mother fucker!
HeIp! I get it. I get it. HeIp! Turn it off!
Ten minutes with Katie Couric wouId get you ten times the audience...
of a whoIe season of FrontIine. Now, that's a fact.
Yeah, but wh-why wouId they want me to do the interview?
You? Your uncompromising integrity...
your movie star good Iooks and I don't think Katie Couric...
wants to come to this beautifuI fucking vacation spot.
You know I'm not gonna do a P.R. puff piece, right?
Just do the story. Get the reaI girI.
The reaI girI? Is there anything reaI Ieft to get?
Can she actuaIIy taIk?
She's just a needy IittIe kid, NataIie.
I know, and she's spoiIed, she's over-sexed, she's tone deaf.
WeII she's a brand, Hauser.
Stuff happens. She needs a mom.
-Yeah. And don't Iook at me. -I Iike Iooking at you.
You can say anything you want, okay? No hoIds barred deIay. I'II make it Iive.
You're crazy. This bitch hates me.
-She doesn't hate you. -She hates me.
-No she doesn't. -She does. I know.
Yeah, heIIo.
l have lists of Omar's whereabouts.
I'II get to it.
-Put your seatbeIt on. -Fuck off.
Shit.
So we're aII set?
This sucks. I hate this.
-What sucks, sweetheart? -This Iocation.
What's wrong with it?
I am not Iiking it. It bIows.
This is 2000 years of Turaqi cuIture. It's a nice spot for it, actuaIIy.
Okay, sweetie?
I want to do it...
there.
-We're aII set up right here. -There or nowhere.
Okay?
There's nice too.
HeIIo.
What is this pIace?
BeautifuI.
You see? She's just a needy IittIe kid.
This Iight is so cooI.
Look at this!
Be carefuI.
I want to do it here. Come, inspect this from me.
BeautifuI.
This pIace is so sad. I Iove that.
I'm going to see the rest.
Hey, cowboy. You happen to have a CIiff bar?
-You hungry? -I couId eat.
Let's find the kitchen.
Look at this. An 82 margaux. They must have Ieft in a hurry.
We can be shot for Iooting.
We can be shot for anything in Turaqistan.
Let's see. There must be an opener here somewhere.
I just don't know if I'm domestic enough to make a meaI out of...
oIives and caviar and peanut butter.
Yonica! There's food!
Very high-tech for Turaqistan.
Crazy IittIe brat.
If she's a virgin...
I'm Dick Cheney.
Yonica, wouId you Iike some wine?
No. I hate wine. It's so sour.
MiIk is good.
-I want a picture of you two. -No pictures.
Okay, one.
Get in.
So you two getting married?
Because you are aIready married with wife in America?
Everybody wants American wife.
No.
Never were married?
Was once actuaIIy.
What happened?
It's not that interesting.
What happened?
Haven't spoken of it in a Iong time.
She was killed.
Murdered.
I came home one night and my beautifuI wife had been sIaughtered.
I had a IittIe girI and she was taken.
No ransom note, nothing. Just gone.
-Why? -I don't know.
Who wouId do that?
I don't know anything except it was aII because of me.
What do you mean?
I had many enemies. I've done many things.
What was her name? Your daughter?
Cara.
There's a reason I do this work.
I don't have to feeI anything.
That's so fucked up.
Hey. Whassup?
Get out!
Sometimes I think is better not to feeI. Just skip it.
How Iong can you Iive that way?
The poison's just oId. It's Iike a sIow motion suicide.
Or wake up every day and wonder if you have the courage to waIk away...
to say: no, I won't do that. I'm not that person. I'm not that thing.
You think I shouId not marry Ooq-Mi-Fay?
Hey, boss we have a problem.
HoId that thought.
What's the probIem, guys?
Try some caviar.
It's so good!
I Iove.
My mom wouId aIways try to get me to eat weird stuff.
Tempeh and wheatgrass...
and aII I ever wanted was peanut butter.
He's a compIicated guy, huh?
Not what'd you think.
Hey, not so tough today, huh?
Hey, Iook, the IittIe girI has crowns.
You think you can drown me with the sheep shit.
I don't think so.
You want we shouId take video now?
Or kiII him first?
Be Iess bIood if you kiII me first, more fun if you cut it off whiIe I'm aIive.
-Shut up. -Okay.
I think I couId take those two ears and I can put them on my HarIey.
Maybe I can pick up KROQ on my radio.
Oh, pretty face. Bye.
You ought to do some face. Taste.
Stay!
Cut off the fingers I used to wipe my ass.
I cannot beIieve you just did that!
What person couId squeeze eyebaIIs from Bodhi Bhundhang?
And that asshoIe teIIs me not to marry Ooq-Mi-Fay?
I'm fucking marry Ooq-Mi-Fay.
He's pig. And I'm whore.
-You want me to take the freeway? -Yeah. Whatever.
It is who I am. I am that person.
And if I'm going to be whore, at Ieast I can be rich.
I just want to make souIfuI music and be sad and rich.
You don't have to marry some asshoIe to do that.
NataIie, you wiII be my bridesmaid?
PIease?
My father, he's coming. I haven't seen him since I was baby.
It wiII be nice to meet him.
And if you are there I wiII not be so afraid.
What am I gonna wear?
-What about Katie Courich? -Fuck her.
Fuck them aII.
Miami Beach HoteI.
Jeff? I just sent you a photo of that TamerIane guy.
He just sIaughtered haIf a dozen of Ooq- Mi-Fay Taqnufmini's posse...
Find out who the fuck this guy is.
Hey. l just got this message from the Viceroy.
''We didn't front you $1.3 million to whack a bunch of Fifty Cent wannabes.
You know what l'm saying? You got 1 8 hours to kill Omar Sharif.
And may l just add personally.
What the fuck are you doing?
Will you kill the mother fucker so we can get the hell out of this shithole?
What are you doing?
Hello? ls there anyone in th-?
Hey, it's Natalie.
l'm either unmasking corporate greed or washing my hair.
So leave a message.
That's good. Thanks. Great.
Is that good?
That Iooks great. Everything you're doing is great. It's reaIIy great.
My communications degree is finaIIy paying off.
Where is Omar?
WeII, Iet me check. Omar?
-Camera Four, Marsha. Camera Four. -Omar's Camera Four.
Why don't you puII in?
Do you have his BIackberry address?
Laptop.
By the way, Anderson Cooper cannot make the wedding.
-What room was he going to stay in? -EIeven-oh-one.
Just you, Cowboy.
Oh, jeez. Gosh. By the way. This came for you.
I think...
...It must have been this morning and...
This is Natalie Hegalhuzen.
l am being held by the Provisional Liberation Army of Greater Turaqistan.
l will be executed unless the following demands are met by 6 pm.
The compIete unconditionaI withdrawaI of aII TamerIane forces from Turaqistan.
The dissoIution of the criminaI's INS state of IsraeI.
Three. The acquisition by the Turaqi NationaI BasketbaII team...
of LeBron James for a pIayer to be named Iater.
I'm unhurt and weII-treated...
And am right where I wanted to be.
You're improvising, bitch. I hate that!
I know where she is.
No. Wait a second! We're Iive in 6 hours.
I trust you. You handIe everything.
Oh, Jesus Mary and Joseph.
How are you, sir? Nice to see you, sir.
You can go.
Jerry, how do I get to FaIIaf?
Fallaf. Are you out of your mind?
Here at GuideStar we definitely call Fallaf a no-go zone.
That's snuff city, dude.
Hey, don't get cute. Just give me the damn directions.
You sound a little angry, rather emotional. lt's a good thing.
Good. Let it go.
Is that the best you can do for seventy-nine ninety-five a month?
Steven SeagaI is Iike 500 pounds now.
They use body doubIes for everything, but this.
How many times do I have to teII you?
I am opposed to the occupation.
I have raiIed against it in every significant journaI in the worId!
I think you are mistaking me with someone who actuaIIy gives a fuck.
Hey, you're just a gift for us, babe.
What do I do when I get to NafIuni?
There's a Mobil station on your right. See it?
Yeah. I think so.
Great. Take the next right. Follow the road.
lf you're a praying man, l'd start about now.
Can we kiII her aIready? I'm getting hungry.
We're stiII working out the internationaI distribution rights.
I want to...
put the camera Iower this time.
Oh, you mean Iike the construction guard decapitation, huh?
But you want it from here to there or from there to here?
-AII the way. -AII the way's gonna be messy.
Yeah, but it's art.
-Do you have any candy? -No. Get Iost.
I toId you these asshoIes never have shit.
Looking for the kidnapped bitch?
American?
We have three. Two yeIIow hair and one dark hair.
Dark hair.
Where?
Show me.
10? No. How about 20? Okay. It's a deaI.
Shut up! Let's do it.
Don't shoot, man!
Hey, we're sorry. ChiII.
I'm sorry, just take the girI. We don't want the girI.
We just, we do movies, man. We Iove to make movies.
Yeah, yeah, movies.
Don't get up, guys. We gotta run.
Fuck, dude. That was intense.
Okay. We're okay.
Next time bring some candy asshoIe.
Mr. Hauser? l told you Fallaf was not a good idea, didn't l?
lt's a no-go zone. And you went.
That was not a good idea.
Get down!
Go.
CouId you pIease try to caII NataIie again?
What the fuck is wrong with you?
What, my EngIish not so good?
Come on. I Iove you.
Come on here. Come on here.
Get down, get down!
Get up.
Hey, you in charge?
-Who the fuck's in charge? -No one! I'm no one!
-What are you Iookin' at, bitch? -I'm no one!
A coupIe of quick announcements.
The paneI discussion, the Redemptive Power of the Hedge Fund Derivative...
has been moved to the mini baIIroom.
Don't forget to go to the Meet and Greet cocktaiI reception...
at the Tiki Room at five and pick up your gift bags.
They've got a coffee mug and a desert umbreIIa...
foam beer Koozie and a...
autographed copy from you know who...
of ''How I Conquered the WorId and Worked Out Issues With My Dad''.
Take care of the kid.
'Cause I might have to go too.
You don't have to.
Yes, I do.
NataIie.
I saw your face and creation heId its breath.
I'm coming.
No, no, no...
SiIIy me. I was expecting a beautifuI woman.
Sorry.
Hauser...
Love does get one into difficuIt situations.
Somebody's gonna kiII you.
It was supposed to be me.
TripIe your security.
Stay off the streets.
With a IittIe skiII you may actuaIIy stay aIive.
-How may I thank you? -No need.
We're in a constant state of war, Hauser.
We kiII our brothers, compIete strangers...
the guiIty and the innocent.
We are at war with our own hearts.
Love is a cease-fire that's destined to faiI.
But, as I said...
it does get us into tricky situations.
Sometimes the back of a garbage truck.
The uItimate Chickenhawk is roosting cIose-by.
Good Iuck.
She says she's a bridesmaid.
-You got an extra dress? -Yes.
For all of us at Tamerlane...
l extend a heartfelt good luck and God bless...
whoever that god may be.
To our happy young couple. Shalom.
Shit.
We have someone to do your hair and makeup.
I couId do this.
Sit down!
CIean yourseIf!
We gotta go to the viceroy. Where the heII is Hauser?
AsshoIe.
AII right.
I am going to teII that bastard that I want to go shopping in America.
And I never come back. Can I stay with you?
Yes. Yes. Yes.
It's time.
Where are you? I wanna see you.
Hauser. l'm about to address the weddin'.
You're just gonna have to wait 'til l'm done.
I've waited Iong enough.
Hauser.
HeIIo, WaIken. You Iook fabuIous.
How did you know?
Where eIse wouId you be?
And going to the Viceroy in five...
four, three, two...
Wonderful opportunities here, Hauser.
As long as these towel-heads don't look up freedom in the dictionary.
To use one of your own homespun colloquialisms let's cut the shit, shall we?
That is your viceroy?
You know what your probIem is, Hauser? You're a moraIist.
That's why you're so much fun to fuck with.
War is the improvement of investments by other means.
For dummies. The USA is a subdivision of TamerIane.
Democracy, the war on terror, the war on drugs...
these are aII focus group sIogans for TamerIane.
You murdered my wife. And I'm here to kiII you for that.
You were such a superb kiIIing machine, Hauser.
What happened to you?
You've had a whoIe week to kiII Omar.
Of course I couId have Iiquidated you after you thought you'd kiIIed me.
Right after I tried to kiss you and you threw me in the garbage truck.
It's gonna be hard to torture someone who's mostIy dead.
But I'm gonna try...
to enjoy it.
But, by kiIIing the woman and kidnapping the girI...
Oh, my God.
...that was so much more satisfying.
I Ieft you in a state of constant agony.
You ever wonder what the ideology of vibrio cholerae bacterium...
or the system of Yersinia pestis the bacteria that causes bubonic plague.
I'II teII you, Hauser.
Perpetuation.
An infinite succession of generations.
ImmortaIity on the instaIIment pIan.
I wish I had that sort of esprit d'corps.
That bacteriaI team spirit.
TaIk about Iegacy. TaIk about empire.
You're gonna teII me what you did with her...
then I'm gonna kiII you again.
-Do you understand, oId man? -Don't you get it?
Your daughter happens...
Shut it down!
Your daughter, Hauser.
Your daughter is about to be married. And, Daddy you're the father of the bride.
God, that's a conversation stopper.
WeII, you just sit back and enjoy the show.
You must be a reaI proud daddy.
Here she comes.
Ain't you the proudest daddy? Look at that.
She turned out good.
She Iooks good in that white dress and those IittIe white boots.
A white dress and white boots.
Oh, Iook at that.
Don't you think the IittIe whore turned out weII?
I promised her Daddy wouId be here. And here you are.
Shoot him!
The father of the bride!
Hauser! Where are you, Hauser?
Come on, fight me Iike a dude. Face me Hauser.
Come on!
I can controI aII of this with my eyes.
Yonica!
-Yonica. -Shut the fuck up!
-Yonica. Yonica. -Shut the fuck up! Shut up.
Get done, come on.
DearIy beIoved, friends, beIievers and infideIs.
We are gathered here today...
to join together in hoIy matrimony this man and this...
Yonica! Yonica!
Hauser!
You can't do this. I won't Iet you.
I'm your father.
Catch him.
It's me.
I've Ioved you since the minute you were born.
I wiII kiII you!
It's gonna be okay.
We're gonna be a famiIy again.
Come on!
Yonica, Yonica.
Let go of that! Don't do that.
What's going on?
Go, go, go, go, go!
Go, go, go!
Get me back to the bunker. Headset.
Get me a tomahawk.
BIow this whoIe fuckin' pIace to shit.
Yes, sir.
Terrorists at the weddin'. We've got 'em cornered.
So cIose to the bunker couId be dangerous, sir.
Haven't you heard of a surgicaI strike?
-Launch it. -Firing two-one.
Viceroy coming through. Viceroy coming through.
You shouId have Iet me finish the job!
TamerIane weapons are precision-guided...
to minimize coIIateraI damage.
Not onIy is our technoIogy the most advanced in the worId...
but aIso with a smart missiIe system...
we can Iaunch a matchstick in MiIwaukee...
and stick it up the ass of termite in Tehran.
Shit happens.
This bIows.
''KiIIer, Whores and JackaIs. Behind Brand USA''.
Good titIe, huh?
It's a IittIe wordy.
VehicIe from the front!
AII right, that's it! HoId it!
We are going to honeymoon.
Dude, it's the newIyweds!
Hey! Stand down!
Yonica, congratuIations. Your chariot's right this way.
Thank you.
-I have your poster on my waII. -No, he's Iyin'. It's my waII.
I used to... no. Bye.
Run, run, run.
I cannot fucking beIieve this.
Yonica, I know I saved you but I don't want you putting me up on a pedestaI.
I'm just a person, just a man.
Are you crazy? Where have you been?
-You are a fucking asshoIe, you know? -Oh, I feeI much better.
Go. Turn this thing on!
So you don't want her to be an assassin like you.
Well, don't worry because l want to be like you.
-Yonica, don't be so sarcastic. -l'm not.
-Where are we going? -l don't know.
What do you mean, l don't know?
When l said l don't know, it means l don't know.
-GuideStar! -Welcome back, Mr. Hauser.
l can book you an hotel, make you a dinner reservation.
You wanna just be spontaneous?
Spontaneous? lt's Memorial Day weekend, what if everything's full?
lt's not gonna be full. Jerry, am l right?
Don't get Jerry involved in this.
WouId you two stop fighting?
We're not fighting. We're just discussing.
-lt be sounding like fighting. -Now she hates fighting.
Well, what do you expect? Look at her father!
This is the former vice president speaking.
In response to the cowardIy and unprovoked terrorist...
attack on the EmeraId City maII...
TamerIane is pIeased to announce that it has been awarded the contract...
to preemptiveIy strike Ugikistan...
which inteIIigence has confirmed is behind this...
and hundreds of other attacks in Turaqistan.
America cannot stand idIy by and aIIow hostiIe foreign powers...
to meddIe in Turaqi affairs.
InteIIigence has aIso concIusiveIy stated...
that the Ugikis are deveIoping a nucIear arsenaI...
and we cannot Iet the smoking gun come in the form of a mushroom cIoud.